You, Me, and Us
by Tsaritza Mika
Summary: After yet another fight, Kurz and Melissa retreat to the rooms of their house to think.


**Ok, I have no idea how many people actually read these notes, but on the off chance that you do, I wanted to explain this little one-shot of mine. This one-shot is not meant to bad mouth the idea or practice of marriage, as I myself have been happily married to my husband for the last six years, and couldn't be happier, but marriage isn't for everyone. Sometimes in order to be able to fully commit to someone, you have to have a sense of freedom. I believe that Kurz and Melissa are two of these people. The two of them have never struck me as people who would feel the need or really want to get married at all, and especially with Melissa's past experiences, there might still be a psychological aversion to it for her. I'm not aware if it is common practice in other countries, but if Kurz and Melissa were to live in America (where I live), I believe they would eventually have what is known as a 'Common Law Marriage'. This occurs when two people have dated for approx. 7-10 years, live at the same address, and share everything, but have never married. They are considered a married couple by the state because they have committed to a long term relationship with one person, but have never decided/wanted to actually marry. **

**I'm also not sure about other people, but after marrying my husband, we had a bunch of people who immediately assumed that we would literally become different people, and fit into the mental molds of what they all believed we should be. We couldn't even banter without family members asking us if our marriage was in trouble or not. To me, it was wrong and incredibly annoying, but to people like Melissa and Kurz, comments like those could and most likely would hurt their marriage. Anyway, this was my reasoning when writing this. I don't expect people to agree with me, this is just my personal view of these two. Thanks for reading!**

**Mika**

* * *

The house was finally quiet. After fighting for the last three hours and yelling at each other until their throats were sore, both of them had finally given up and retreated to their respective cool down rooms. For Melissa, it was their bedroom, for Kurz, it was their den. The routine that had set in the last two months was anything but happy. Every day had been worse than the last, and both of them had been left wondering exactly why it kept happening. Each morning they would wake up, if they saw each other they would argue over breakfast, go to work, argue once they arrived home, split into their respective sanctuaries, then it all depended on whether or not Melissa unlocked the door to the bedroom before she went to bed. Though most nights these days, Kurz had given up on trying for the bedroom and all but moved down into the living room.

Slumping forward in his chair, he leaned over the desk, supporting his head in his hands as he fought the urge to just break down and cry like a baby. _'How could this happen? How did everything go so wrong?'_ Even from downstairs in the office he could hear Melissa upstairs in their bedroom. How everything had gotten so toxic between them he had no idea, but whatever it was, it was slowly killing both of them and the love they had built.

Looking back, everything had been going wonderfully. Both of them had been so happy at one point. They'd both been given contracts by the US government to assist in the training of their soldiers in the fields they excelled at, given a beautiful two-story home on the Zama Army Base, and had been able to reconnect with Sousuke and Kaname, who had purchased a home a few districts away in Sagamihara after their graduation. Everything had been so perfect, and then they had gotten married. After coming home from the honeymoon, it all seemed to just...fall apart. They argued constantly, yelled and said hurtful things to each other that they had never said before. They had thrown chairs and other objects across the rooms they had been in to accentuate their anger, and at one point, Melissa had even gotten mad enough to punch him.

That had been the first night he had slept on the couch.

It wasn't as if she hadn't hit him before, hell, he was sure that because of a few of her punches that he was missing more than a fair few of his earlier memories, but this time it had been different. There had been no annoyingly playful banter, no ridiculous flirting, and it had long since past the point when she had felt the urge to hit him when he brought up the subject of activities in the bedroom. Even now Kurz couldn't bring himself to be angry at her for that punch to the face. Both of them had been fighting for two hours by the time she had thrown that hit, and though it had hurt him, it was nothing compared to the pain that had grown inside afterward. Instead of being angry at her, he had cried that night. Cried for the horrible things they had both said to each other, and the fact that he had driven her so far into an emotional corner that she felt she had to hit him in her defense. Things had only continued going downhill from there. When they weren't arguing, they hardly spoke a word to each other at all, and it felt like years since the last time they had been able to even eat in the same room without something breaking out between them.

Letting his left arm fall to the desks surface to steady him, Kurz stared down at the gold band on his finger. A few stray tears escaped and made their way down his face as he stared, his brain still running a million miles an hour over their situation. He knew without a doubt that he still loved her. At the behest of a few of the men he knew on the base, he had only thought of trying to be with anyone else once when he had been out at the bar on base a few weeks ago, after their day had concluded. The very thought of even considering it had left him face down in the toilet, expelling the single rum and coke he had ordered, as well as what he could eat of his lunch that day. No, if anything he loved Melissa more now than he had the first time they met. Even through the last few months of complete hell they had given each other, she always came home right after work, and still wore his ring on her finger.

If the ring hadn't been enough of an indicator though, it was little things done for him that he never saw that made him sure of it. It showed when he woke up on the couch, the blanket he had never retrieved covering him, and his boots removed and sitting upright near the door. It showed when he arrived home and found a plastic covered sandwich on the table had been left out for him, a sticky note on top reminding him that he needed to keep up his strength if he was going to teach those students of his properly. Hundreds of little details ran through his mind, reminding him of all the little things that she _still_ did. Yes, it was obvious that Melissa still loved him as well, but the toxicity that had stagnated their marriage had grown to unbelievable levels, so neither of them could hardly even speak of it anymore.

Still staring down at the seemingly harmless gold band on his finger, the more he thought about it, the more his heartache and pain cleared. _'Of course...'_ he thought. His eyes widened as everything seemed to finally fit into place, the ring still glittering from its place on his left hand. _'It's...it's because of this. This...this thing!'_ Ever since the wedding, it was as if neither of them could really breathe anymore. Everyone around them asking, and prodding them as to when they would eventually fall into their appropriate rolls had been constricting their very beings, and had begun to come out in the form of arguments between the both of them. Seeing the ring on his hand now for what it was, Kurz yanked it off and slammed it on the desk in front of him, leaning back in his chair and staring at it a moment longer. The sense of freedom was amazing...

The second that infernal band had left his possession, it was as if he could feel a weight lifting off his shoulders. The anxiety that had built in him seemed to disappear into thin air, and the pain surrounding his heart had loosened. That had been it, this had been their problem, and they never even noticed. Melissa had told him, after Mithril had fallen apart and they had found an apartment together, everything about her childhood and why she had joined the Marines. Growing up she had been forced into a roll that she never wanted, the roll of the quiet, subservient, Chinese wife in training. She had been set up into an arranged marriage that she didn't want, with a man she never even knew, because her father had a plan set for her, regardless of her feelings on the matter. The rings they now wore, no matter where they came from, or if he or that other nameless asshole had given it to her, the source of all of their problems had been resting on their left hands the whole time.

Finally realizing the ring for what it had been, Kurz left it on the table and quietly went upstairs. Listening from outside the door, the sounds from earlier had died down quite a bit, but he could still hear her crying. Having an idea of how to begin mending everything between them, he retreated back down to the den, grabbing his guitar and making his way back up to sit in the middle of the hallway facing their bedroom door. It had been so long since the last time he had sang to her, or at all really. Strumming the strings, he realized that his theory had been right. The longer he went without that ring weighing him down, the better he continued to feel.

"Ten miles from town, and I just broke down  
Spittin' out smoke on the side of the road  
I'm out here alone, just tryin' to get home  
To tell you I was wrong, but you already know  
Believe me I won't stop at nothing  
To see you so I started running

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughing with you  
Cause I'm thinkin' that  
All that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through  
Cause I know there's no life after you

The last time we talked, the night that I walked  
Burns like an iron in the back of my mind  
I must have been high, to say you and I  
Weren't meant to be and just wasting my time  
Oh why did I ever doubt you  
You know I would die here without you"

He was ashamed of it, but that had been true too. He _had_ walked out once, after a particularly bad fight, but it hadn't been to anywhere in particular. In truth he had spent about four hours that night just wandering the streets of Tokyo, secretly envying and hating the smiling faces that walked past him, and how easy their lives seemed. Sousuke had later found him, soaked and sitting on a bench in a small park in the pouring rain, before taking him back to the home he shared with Kaname. That night had been Kurz's greatest shame, especially when after they thought him asleep in their guest room, he heard Kaname call Melissa, and tell her that he was alright. _'She must have been calling everywhere that night...'_ he mused as he continued playing. _'She probably called everywhere she thought I might go looking for me, and hoping I didn't turn up dead in a gutter somewhere. Mel, my Melissa, how could you ever want me to come back to you after something like that?'_

"All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughing with you  
Cause I'm thinkin' that  
All that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through  
Cause I know there's no life after you"

Looking up at the sound of the door, he almost wanted to break down and cry again at the sight of her. She had tear streaks down her face, and her once clear violet eyes were puffy and red. The dark circles under her eyes showed how much sleep she had been losing, wearing one of his shirts that was practically hanging down to her mid-thigh. Feeling his heart break at the knowledge that he let so much come between them, he forced himself to keep going.

"You and I, right or wrong  
There's no other one  
After this time spent alone  
I do believe that a man with sight can be so blind  
Thinkin' 'bout the better times  
Must have been outta my mind  
So I'm runnin' back to tell you

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
Without you god knows what I'd do  
All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughing with you  
I'm thinkin' that  
All that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through  
No there's no life after you"

Setting down the instrument, he watched as she carefully sat down from behind the crack she had opened in the door, his heart paining at the sight. _'She almost looks scared to let me in...can't say I blame her after everything that been going on between us lately...'_

"Mel, I...god, I can't even begin to say how sorry I am. I've been such an asshole...please, I know I don't deserve it, I don't deserve you...but, please come out and talk to me...I miss you..." Slowly, after what seemed almost like hours, Melissa came out, coming to sit on the floor in front of him with her legs crossed. Both of them looked like absolute hell, and the exhaustion was evident in both their eyes. Taking a deep breath, Kurz ran a hand through his hair, hoping and praying to whatever deity might be listening, that they could move past this together, and begin healing. "Melissa, I-I've been thinking...I did a lot of that tonight, and I..."

"Please..."

"Huh?"

More tears had begun to make their way down her face as she spoke, and though he had wanted to hear what she had to say, her words began scaring him. "Please don't say it...don't say you want to leave...I-I couldn't..."

"No! Melissa no!" Leaning over to take her, he held her close, her tears staining his shirt as they hugged for what seemed like the first time in years. "Mel, I don't want to leave. Fucking hell, you know I can't live without you! It was only because of you that I survived my M9 getting toasted! Twice! That whole time, the only thing I could ever think about was you. Fuck Mel, I could never live without you."

"Good...cause I'd have to kill you if you tried again." Through the tears on his shirt he could feel her smiling in relief, and he couldn't help but join her. He wanted to say that he couldn't believe that she would think he would want to leave her, but with everything that had happened the last two months, he couldn't say he blamed her. Taking a moment to laugh at her threat, Kurz brought her up to face him, wasting only a second for them to breathe before kissing her. It wasn't until just then that he realized how much he had treasured that first kiss so long ago, in her bunk on the Danaan. So much shit had crowded them since then, come between them, and now it just felt good to shove it all aside and let themselves feel again. Finally pulling back for some air, they stayed there, foreheads pressed against each other as the air between them began to clear.

"Mel, I need to ask you something."

"Hm? What?"

"Mel, ...Melissa Mao, will you do me the honor, of divorcing me?"

"...wha...what the fuck are you talking about?"

"Before you say anything else, think about it. Everything was great, you and I were amazing, ...before the wedding. After that, ...I don't know what happened. Everything just got so bad and, and it was like I couldn't breathe or something. Mel, none of that shit...none of it means anything to us, so why did we even try?" She was still staring at him like he was nuts, but in all actuality, he was speaking perfect sense. Melissa had her issues with marriage, before he had even asked, so why did she say yes? Neither of them had ever agreed with the conforming ideals that had been presented to them growing up.

Melissa was supposed to have been a loyal and subservient wife, always backing up her husband and being the perfect picture of femininity. Kurz was supposed to be a normal teenager when they had met, his most life altering decisions laying in what would he wear for the party on Friday night or which college he wanted to attend. Instead, they were soldiers. Tough enough to take on the world and everything it shot at them, throwing it back and making sure it knew that both of them would rather die than be people they weren't. Both still held immense pride over the fact that despite what they _should_ have been, the two of them had ultimately been a part of the most elite military the world had had to offer. The two of them had never wanted to be shoved into the molds of what they supposedly _should_ have been, yet when the time came, they had let it happen all too easily. "I...I think I get what you're saying, but, what about our home? What about everything else?"

"Who says any of it has to change? Melissa, there's nothing I want more than to spend my life with you, but if doing that means never marrying you, then fuck the system, cause I don't want it. You know as well as I do that we don't need these damn rings to know how we feel. Even before those shiny pieces of metal, _I_ knew I loved you more than anything." Taking a moment to wipe away the remaining streaks covering her face, he smiled sadly at the reminder of how bad they let things get.

"So, what happens...if we...if we ever wanted a family?"

"Mel, come on, we could still be a family and not be married, you know that. And as long as whatever kids we may have someday are loved and know that we love each other, I promise you that whether or not we're married will be the _last_ thing on its mind." The silence in the house seemed to close in on them right then, and the longer he looked in her eyes, the clearer the reason behind her question had become. She wasn't asking what would happen _if_ they ever conceived a child. She was telling him that they already _had_ conceived. Melissa was pregnant. "M-Mel, you mean...?"

"Yeah...looks like you're gonna be a Daddy."

Time seemed to stop for him, sitting in the knowledge that had literally been dropped right into his lap. Melissa was pregnant with his child. He was going to be a father. Words couldn't describe the feelings running through him just then, there were just too many fighting for attention that they all seemed to blur together. Forcing himself to speak through the thickness in his throat, he made sure to keep his voice level, not wanting to upset her by having her think by any means that this was a bad thing. "H-How long...have you known?"

"Almost two months now. The day before we got back from the honeymoon, remember we thought I had caught the flu? I-I went to the doctor, and he told me then." Kurz felt his heart breaking all over again as she looked at him, more tears coming to her eyes and making their way down her face before he could wipe them away. "I-I didn't know how to tell you. Things just kept getting worse, and I ...I didn't want you to think I was doing it to ..."

"Fuck, Mel... I know you can't control something like that! Please, I've been such an asshole...these last two months have just...somehow, I don't care how, ...could you ever forgive me for being so fucking stupid?"

"Hey, shut the fuck up, I was stupid too you know. It was my fault too." Sharing in their moment of weakness, the only sounds in the whole house was the hushed ones they made. Quiet echoes of apologies and promises, eventually melting away into comforting sighs and moans of pleasure. An hour later, the two of them still tangled amongst the clothes they had torn from each other in the moment, Melissa took off the ring she'd worn constantly for the last two months with a sigh of relief, flinging it over the edge of the banister and letting it fall down the stairs. "Kurz?"

His face still buried in the short hair at the back of her neck, he had been slowly moving one hand in large, slow circles over her still flat belly, trying to imagine how she would look months from then, the life they created together growing within her. "Yeah?"

"Yes." Hearing the faint questioning noise he had made from behind, Melissa rolled over to face him, happily seeing that the stress had all but disappeared from their faces. Languidly reaching over, she ran a slow, soothing hand through his hair before bringing it back to move him closer for another kiss. "I will divorce you...I wouldn't want to divorce anyone else in the whole world."

The smile on his face turned to a light chuckle, though she didn't have to wonder exactly what he was laughing at. The concept was absurd, but neither of them cared. "We really are fucked up, aren't we Mel?"

"Yeah, but it works for us, so fuck it."

"I love you so much, Melissa."

"I love you too..."

**~~~6 months later~~~**

Melissa smiled as she held her newborn son. The little bastard had come a month early, effectively ruining his father's birthday party, but somehow she doubted that he minded very much. If anything, it was probably the best birthday present he would ever receive. Looking over to the chairs that had been set up in the corner of the room, sat her boyfriend and ex-husband. His feet were propped up with an extra chair as he slept, his head leaning on his shoulder as his other arm cradled a small blue bear that Kaname and Sousuke had given them after the delivery. The morning after they had had their talk and made up, right there on the hallway floor and twice more in the bedroom, they had rushed down to the courthouse on the opposite side of the base. They had made a huge show of it too, so much so that she was sure there was a fair few of those living on the base that truly believed they were insane.

They had stopped over at the shopping center, and picked up a short veil and obnoxious clip-on bowtie from one of the party stores, wearing them and laughing as the judge had dissolved their marriage. Since then, those two months of pure hell seemed like nothing but a nightmare they had both woken up from. Finally, they felt like themselves again, and every day since had only gotten better. It was as if none of it had ever happened. They ended up selling their rings and using the amount they had gotten for them to start up a possible college fund for the child, not really knowing if he would want to go, but leaving the option available none the less.

Hearing her new son fuss a bit, Melissa turned back to look down at him. He had her hair color, but it was obvious that it was going to be thick like his father's; and they couldn't be sure yet, but it was a high possibility that his eyes would stay the dark blue that he had now. _'You're gonna be one __hell __of a heart breaker when you get older...Zack.'_

Hearing movement from the corner, she turned to see Kurz sleepily moving his chair over to the side of the bed. She was sure that she looked the worst out of the two of them, but even so, he looked pretty worn out as well. Reaching over to ruffle his hair, he smiled back at her as he leaned to fold his arms on the edge of the bed and rest his head and yawned widely. Setting Zack down in the blue bassinet on the other side of her bed, she laid back and reached for his hand, their fingers entwining as they settled on the blankets between them. "I love you, you old perv."

"Love you too Mel."


End file.
